


Here

by queerioes



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: After the BOM Episode, Anxiety, Blasting through space and talking about feelings, Canon Universe, Developing Relationship, Explicit Language, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Galra Keith (Voltron), Holding Hands, M/M, THE HUG™
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-25
Updated: 2017-03-25
Packaged: 2018-10-10 14:30:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,952
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10439718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queerioes/pseuds/queerioes
Summary: Shiro was there. He was still there. But would he stay?Indulgent Sheith fluff n' feels after the BOM episode. :3cCommissioned by@fenriiison twitter/Glossolaliaon AO3.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Glossolalia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glossolalia/gifts).



Shiro was there. On the other side of the doors and hallucinations, he had braced Keith’s arms, holding him steady even when their surroundings began to shake apart. Despite the world turning upside down and Keith surviving what felt like being left behind all over again, he left the trials behind him. A feeling swelling up within him that he'd defied the odds and come out stronger than before. Almost. 

“Keith! Are you alright?”

_ I don’t know.  _

Keith’s legs shake as he strips off the Marmoran suit with Red having called off her assault on the base. The sweat-soaked layers are sickeningly sticky on Keith’s skin, as he peels them down and away from his body. Sore and marred, he drops the alien suit around his ankles, taking his clothes and armor from an assisting Shiro. His memories buzz around his head, filling his ears with an uncomfortable ringing. Keith’s nerves are raw, shaken by what the trials have shown him, by what came surging to the surface within him. Like these trials jarred the very building blocks of his calmness, shaking his core. Keith’s head hangs, as he forces himself to steady his breathing. His mind drifts in and out of changing, like he’s fighting to keep himself conscious. The presence behind him, temporarily forgotten, jolts his thoughts out of their spiral downward.  _ Shiro’s there. _

Thoughtful fingers brush his shoulder, sending a wave of goosebumps down Keith’s arms and jettisoning his heart into his throat. He tenses at all of the thoughts that he can’t process right now on top of everything else, swallowing what threatens to choke him. Shiro touches the unusual cut on Keith’s shoulder, thumbing over it’s burn-like shape. His scars on the outside will match the ones he wears on the inside. 

“It’s alright.” Keith doesn’t care about marks on his body. In a way, he feels like they bring him closer to Shiro. 

Keith feels himself sinking into a dark pool of overwhelming thoughts. He'd been anxious since the ride in Red, with Shiro there to witness his frenzied and reckless state over their abysmal conversation on the ultimate passage of leadership to Keith. The heavy title of The Leader on his shoulders  _ and _ Shiro not being there, again _ , _ was too much. Keith had no grip. When Keith watches Shiro go into mentoring mode, Garrison-grade training that keeps him two steps ahead, it makes him feel like a failure. Control over his emotions had been more of a struggle recently, and he couldn’t expect the others to understand why. It feels like his whole life is one big unanswered question now. 

Keith’s grip tightens around the paladin suit handed to him. There’s a frantic buzzing gnawing at his senses, like his nerves are on fire. His mind is racing just thinking about what Shiro had said right before they landed making his jaw clench. His chest feels tight, heaving like he’s been running for hours. 

He  _ wants _ Shiro there. Whether it’s an unknown threat or this new Galra part of himself, Keith doesn’t want anything to take Shiro away. He knows that shit happens, like Kerberos and the last year. Shiro came back, though. Right now, Keith can’t afford to think about the what if’s of Shiro being taken away from him again, because he'll crack.   
  
Keith’s chest is tight and painful. His paladin’s suit still open in the back, he can feel Shiro’s fingers calmly smoothing up his spine. 

“Keith, did you feel anything different about that Galran suit?”

It’s difficult to breath. “N-no. I don’t think so.” 

“Down your back… it’s purple, similar to the Galran coloring.” 

Keith feels like the air is knocked out of him by panic. He couldn’t be transforming, could he? The suit wouldn’t have fused with his physiology, right? No, he’d be able to tell, but that’s not convincing him. His heart rate is picking up. It’s like he’s lost complete control of himself, fear burning his lungs. Keith feels sick, blood rushing through his ears as a headache splits his head open. Shiro grips his arm tightly, picking up on the obvious distress as Keith’s sense of balance precariously lurches. 

“Keith, you’re alright.” He would do anything to keep from showing this weak and vulnerable side to Shiro. “It’s probably nothing, you’re alri—”

Rounding on Shiro, Keith snaps, “Y-you don’t know that! Don’t tell me I’m alright.”

Shiro stops dead. He won’t touch him. 

Hand pressed to his forehead, Keith tries to rein himself back in. Convinced that Shiro would back off or leave, Keith squeezes his eyes shut in agony. He doesn’t want to drive Shiro away. He is just trying to play the big brother role again. Mentoring and guiding Keith, and he’s been grateful for that. Shiro’s pulled him out of trouble more times than he could keep count of. He was just trying to help Keith, like with their conversation in Red, but it complicates things between them. There's more there that binds them together. Shiro is someone he trusts and loves. Not as a mentor, but someone who has been there for him, who cares about him.

_ Don’t think about it.  _

Keith just wants him to be there. Just to support him, but even then, it’s hard to voice that, because they’re on a mission. This had been more than a mission to Keith, but how can he tell Shiro that?  _ How _ ? He can’t face Shiro being disappointed in him. And on top of it all, he’s turning into a Galra, the very beings who ripped them apart, who tortured Shiro for a year in captivity.

He can’t breathe. 

Throat tight and air vacuumed from his body, Keith loses his balance. It’s like before, when Shiro was missing. Even though he’s stronger now, this feeling still takes its toll. His head swirls and throbs. Tremors wreck him. There’s no air. No—

_ Shiro.  _

“I’m here with you, Keith. ” Shiro holds him steady, as his soft voice spills into his ear. 

Keith chokes. Pivoting, he buries his face in Shiro’s chest, as if he could somehow root in there and take some of that Golden Boy calm for himself. Shaking as he tries to draw in a breath, Keith’s sense are keenly aware of Shiro enveloping him. A rough hand running over his exposed skin brings some warmth and life back to him. Keith’s feels his face soften, thinking of Shiro as he tries to bring him out of this anxious fit. He strokes Keith’s back in time with his breathing. 

“Keith, take a deep breath.” 

Peeking through his damp bangs, Keith sees Shiro’s eyes boring into him, looking more concerned than usual. Keith can already hear the Garrison voice of disapproval echoing in his head, naming off everything he did wrong. 

“Slowly. That’s right.”

Keith’s not being reprimanded, but Shiro’s never been harsh with him. He should know that by now. They slide to the floor, sitting like they aren’t in a hurry to get back to the others. Keith’s head is splitting in pain around his ears. Shiro looks strained and alert. The realization must be painted across Keith’s features as he touches his ears.  _ Different.  _ His ears are soft, larger, different. They aren’t human. 

“Keith.” Shiro says his name in a voice so soft, it could cradle him. He’s trying to reassure him. “I promise, it’s going to be okay.”

Shiro gives his arm a squeeze before deadlifting Keith off of the floor. His arms wind around Shiro’s neck, but soon Shiro deposits him in front of a reflective surface. There, he can see them. They look like Galran ears, cat-like. Purple hues in his hair, sweeping down his neck. It must run down his back like Shiro had noted. Cupping his hands over the new ears, Keith hunches his shoulders. He should feel fear, but it doesn’t come. Keith would expect Shiro's calm in any other situation, but with this, he thought Shiro might be more taken aback. Instead, he caresses the back of Keith’s neck, and Keith feels like he can take a breath now. 

“You have human genes. I’m guessing this is the extent of any changes.”

Shiro’s finger strokes the length of his back where his suit hangs open. As Keith relaxes, his ears shrink down, purple pigmentation fading to his normal skin color. With a sigh, he leans into the body behind him. It’s strange how much those touches give Keith relief, a wordless reminder that he’s not facing any of this alone. Staying like that until he’s mostly back to his original state, Shiro’s chin rests on Keith’s head, hands at his hips, like they have many times before. 

This is normal for them. It’s not so intimate that they couldn’t do this in front of others, but it's intimate in that it’s how they are around each other. Comfortable. They give each other the comfort of home. Their home. 

Keith knows there will be a time when he can’t hold this in anymore— how this feels, how they feel together. They’ll have to be open about what’s grown between them, how they’ve neglected it in some ways and fostered it in others. That bond is a part of their future, and he'd sacrifice much to safeguard it. He won’t risk losing it again.  _ So, why can’t he say it now?  _

_ Do it.  _

“I—” His heart throbs.  _ No. Not like this.  _ He swallows the words. “Nevermind.”

Shiro watches Keith. Their eyes lock in the reflection for a moment fleeting enough that Keith wonders if he already knows. Shiro has a long track record of being able to read Keith, but he won’t necessarily own up to it. In that one moment, Keith wishes he would. 

The chin lifts from his head and nimble fingers close up the back of Keith’s suit. The moment passes, and it’s time to move. Shiro’s hand presses his back once more, lingering like the touch has more meaning than he’s letting on. They leave, and Keith’s stomach twists the same way it did the first time he missed his chance.   
  


**::**  
  


After they arrive at the castle ship with Kolivan in tow, after the team reviews all the intel that Shiro and Keith gathered, things grow heavier. With what Keith is out in the open, the atmosphere changes. Shiro moves their conversation forward as best as he can, but Keith feels the cold stares of the Princess. They’re hard to miss, given that she's looking at him the way she looks every time she says Zarkon's name. 

Strategizing with their new allies goes on for hours, and he was already exhausted. When they break at last, Keith disappears, heading towards his living quarters. He needs a chance to process things. His footsteps echo in the abandoned halls, piercing through the emotional barriers he had built out of caution. It's suffocating, caring what the others think of him, but he does care about them, making it impossible to distance himself any further. 

“There you are.” 

_ Shiro. _ His hand gently slides over Keith's back. Shiro’s presence is a comfort when his thoughts, like murky waters were starting to drown him. Keith turns, but chokes on his words again.  _ Why won’t they come out?  _

“S-sorry. I’m tired.” His words are caught on his thoughts, clumsily falling from his mouth. 

“I just… needed some distance from the others.”

Shiro’s features relax, looking at Keith like he usually does. It feels normal. “Why don’t you come to my room. We can both rest there.”

Nodding in agreement, Keith realizes that right now, more than his natural tendency to be alone when worn down, it might be better to have Shiro there. 

Behind the closed door, Shiro rubs Keith’s shoulders, trying to iron out the tension he's holding. A trembling exhale puffs out over his lips as Keith turns to face Shiro. He can’t let it surface, but it does this time, as heat trickles down his cheeks.  _ Oh no.  _ Keith hides his face behind his arm, scrubbing at the tears leaking from his eyes. He thought he could sort things out with Shiro there, find that stability within himself that he desperately needs and keep it together. 

Shiro starts, placing his own discarded armor on the floor. A strong hand cups the back of Keith’s head, resting it to the broad expanse of chest. Fingers tangle in his hair, joined by Shiro’s lips pressing to the top of Keith’s head. It releases the floods gates, as all of what happens comes rushing out over him. It’s like drowning, tears being the regrettable byproduct. 

“Let it out, Keith.” Soft and comforting, Shiro gives him a safe space. 

A sob racks his body, and Shiro squeezes him with his other arm. It dawns on him that Shiro needed this same release when he was gone for that year, and probably never got it. He couldn’t afford to spare a moment out of fear that it would trigger an early demise. Keith doesn’t make any other noises, shaken by everything that comes out at once. Tears plop out one by one onto Shiro’s shirt and the floor. Keith doesn’t feel tense so much as exhausted. There’s too much mental white noise to organize his thoughts, but in moments the tears subside. Breath sputtering and his throat tight, Keith pinches the hem of Shiro’s shirt. 

Fingers pet Keith’s ears. The Galran ones are out again. Like Shiro thought, they must appear with heightened emotion. Shiro's touch is pleasant, but lulling. Keith’s head sinks against Shiro’s chest. There have been moments, held breaths, brushes and glances. Keith needs to say it, even if their body language says it for them. He wants to hear it said aloud. 

The moment passes, though, as Shiro drags his hand down the back of Keith’s neck, then strides to the other side of the room. He rummages  for extra clothes in his drawers. Keith realizes that if he doesn’t take care of himself, Shiro will, which drives heat into his cheeks.  

Keith gets ushered off to shower and change, before he returns to rest on Shiro’s bed. He’s back to his human self— warmed and exhausted, but human. Keith climbs over Shiro and into the bed. There’s not much time, approximately twelve hours until they’re needed at command. Shiro lays next to him, eyes focused somewhere far off, and Keith does the same. He feels a hand lay over his, fingers laced tenderly, as they lay together.

He should give some explanation, or just talk this out with Shiro. The trials were more than either of them expected, and Keith needs to clear the air. 

“I was desperate to find out more about myself. As soon as I saw the insignia, I knew— this was it.” 

For Keith this wasn’t just a mission, it was personal. For the first time in his life, he had access to answers about his life. There was a chance to find more about himself, when he'd thought he had nothing. Except Shiro. 

“Shiro… when the hologram you wanted me to give up my past, I was afraid. I questioned if I cared more about my past than anything, even you.”

Keith feels guilt curdling within him. He'd been selfish, just like the hologram had said, for wanting to risk the team and the mission. He only thought of himself, until he thought of Shiro. Then, he hadn't been able to make the choice to give them up. Keith wouldn’t make that choice if it meant losing Shiro.

“Watching you walk away…” Keith feels his throat get tight again like it had in the trials. He chose his future. He decides who he is as a person, past or not.

Part of Keith is happy to be Galra, because it means he belongs to something bigger than himself. It is a conflicting feeling though, as he also feels that with the team. He had initial weariness of being part of a group, but Voltron changed that. Having a strong desire to keep his star-family whole has increasingly became a source of strength for him. Keith wants them there, beside him, especially Shiro.

“Seeing how Allura feels about...me, I don’t want that. I can’t lose you too—”

“I wouldn’t abandon you.” Keith’s head falls to the side as he listens. “I wouldn’t let you leave either. I’d come running after you.” Shiro squeezes his hand.  “And we’ll find out more about your past. We’ll do it together, Keith.”

A comfortable silence falls over them, Keith taking in the gravity of those words. Shiro isn’t going to disappear on him again. On the edge of his lips, Keith finds what he's been wanting to say. 

“I love you, Takashi.” His voice breaks on his name. 

“I know. I love you too, Keith.”

That’s it. Something he had built up in his mind was that simple. Warm, light, molten emotions fill his stomach and chest. Keith can hardly breathe, but it's the most fulfilling sensation. He’s safe and wanted with Shiro. 

A hand brushes over his bangs, pushing them away as Shiro leans over him to kiss his forehead. His genuineness and affection are often expressed through actions more than they are verbalized. This is important to Shiro— showing his love. Lips gently pressed, missed as soon as they are gone. 

Shiro’s like family to Keith, but he's also like a home: an irreplaceable feeling that resides deep within his being. They rest like that for the remaining hours they have left together until they mobilize with their new allies. Fingers stay intertwined as they lay side by side in comfortable silence until sleep takes them both. 

And when Keith wakes, Shiro’s there. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I look forward to your comments.  
> This commission was very indulgent. I love those boys so much. ;u;
> 
> You can find my [tumblr (boysblush)](http://boysblush.tumblr.com/) & [twitter (@boysblush)](https://twitter.com/boysblush) via those links.
> 
> Come visit my twitter for more news, updates, and projects!  
> 


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